Brandon Lee - 45th Birthday

Brandon Lee - 45th Birthday

Birthdays for most people are rather mundane little events. When you're young you have countdowns till the event. When you're older you pretty much don't care for them, besides the idea of getting shouted free drinks at the local pub by friends. But when the event is for someone who has passed, birthdays tend to turn into significant days that make people reflect on the time passed, rather than how life was lived. Thankfully, the above video tribute wasn't like that.

Like most whose life has been impact by Brandon, I was eager to see what Brandon's sister, Shannon might do for the celebration of his birthday. One never knows how to feel when family members such as Shannon do open up details of their intimate reflections for the public. There is always the odd feeling that somehow the public (whether they are fans ) may not have a right to intrude on what will always be a great loss for those who actually knew him. However, I was stroke by Shannon's sentiments and I found myself enjoying the tribute when pictures of him drifted in and out of fade out effects, played to the very poignant cover of "Hallelujah", which then made me weep. 

Shannon Lee's perspective was something that I felt in retrospect is much needed, especially online. Days of birthdays and death anniversaries can sometimes bring out the "woah is me" attitude of some fans. It's common enough, where fans can sometimes forget that as much as they may feel love or the feelings of missing Brandon, the reality is that the loss of Brandon for family and friends goes far deeper than fans could possibly ever experience themselves. Strangers while they may feel a connection to the man, it is afterall a created connection based on their own unique experiences ( as either a film goer or a martial artist for the most part). For Brandon's loved ones, the loss of his life and his physical role in it will always be one of mixed emotions. I sat down wondering what I would say about one of my own siblings if I experienced the loss of one of them. Would I be able to relay a similar sentiment about them as Shannon did about Brandon? I guess that is an experience that is yet to come, thankfully. Despite the burden of technologies, Shannon's emotions and her pain at having to live without her brother did become apparent as I was watching the video tribute. His life, as she said, was something that he never wasted and which he was passionate about. Whatever his adventures, interests or passions, he enjoyed life. He did have a unique ambition throughout his life, something few people ever have - the desire and knowledge of what you want to spend your life doing. That is something that has always fascinated me about Brandon, and indeed others who have similar desires from a very young age.

When I lost my own mother 10 years ago, Brandon's own death and the loss that he left towards his father's death really gave me a better sense of perspective, as well as my own set of empathies. Once you experience such a profound loss, your life as you knew it, is gone. It's a very strange place to find yourself in, especially when you are still growing up, like I was. I wasn't a child like Brandon was, but still young enough that every event as an adult since has been coupled with the loss of someone who SHOULD of been there to experience life with me. Without a parent (especially a same sex one), there is no validation for half the decisions you make. In many ways, it can be freeing, you aren't bound by parental expectations, though at the same time you are angry that you have to deal with a void for the rest of your life. In time, you get used to a new way of living - a new normal, BUT you never forget and it doesn't take much to still reduce you to tears and memories of a loss of someone you never can forget or hold again. It's a cycle of being okay, then not - feeling fine, then not. 


A while back a friend of Brandon's conveyed to me the idea of how hard of a loss was to someone like Brandon's fiancee, Eliza. The friend said, "at some point, you have to stop asking them if they are okay. Because in actual fact they never will be". I wish more fans could understand that kind of perspective, maybe then they will feel differently about "loving" Brandon in inappropriate ways, or their over zealous expressions of him being everything from strangers's soul mate, to shadow to love to sweetheart. To Brandon, strangers didn't rate for the most part - that's the reality. People who try and intrude and invade on his own loved ones right to claim the loss of Brandon, is something that has to cut deep within Brandon's family and closed friends own beings. Family don't need to be told by fans that Brandon is "with them", because they no doubt feel the truth of that far more deeply than you and I do. They knew the man and experienced that love and soul for themselves, not the projected one on screen that we all saw. Brandon was sacred to those people, and while he may be loved, admired and respected by fans, it doesn't hurt to remember who we are, and who they are too in the proper context.

Fans will always have a role in Brandon's legacy. It's the simple act of remembering someone that keep their spirit and make their life have some real purpose. It's the sentiment that all life has to be preserved and acknowledged that made me want to research, become an historian and eventually a journalist. It is not just about seeking facts to uncover the truth, but remembering and honoring those who came before who should be remembered, just like all humans should be in their lifetime. Just because someone is dead, doesn't make their life, their story or their own perspective and experience irrelevant. Brandon's life mattered, it mattered to me as someone who never knew him. And through research, strangely I feel like I do in some abstract way. It's bizarre, but I never can understand fully an experience I never lived, it's all about perspective.

Shannon's own perspective today has helped me with mine right now.

Happy Birthday Brandon!